Dear Woman Who Became a Mom Before Me,
You drove me crazy. I would try to make plans with you and it would be nearly impossible because of feeding and napping schedules. I mean seriously, we have to have lunch at 11am before Little One has lunch? What?!
When we would hang out, all you had to talk about was your child. You went on and on about the cutest thing they were doing the other day. I felt like I couldn’t connect with you. You had changed. Poor you, that child had completely taken over your life.
You told me you didn’t have time to workout. Sure, I’ve never heard that one before. We’re all busy, but listen you make time for the things that are important. Let me give you a little more guilt about how you’re failing (not getting your workouts in) because I’m sure you don’t feel like a failure in any other area of your life right now.
You told me how exhausting it is to be a stay-at-home-mom. You don’t even understand exhausting. I would work 40 hrs a week and train for marathons. That’s exhausting. You don’t work; you sleep in everyday and spend the day watching TV. I would take your life in a heartbeat.
I was going to be different. You moms had no idea what you were doing, but I was going to be a better parent. I was going to have my cake and eat it too; I could balance being a mom and a “regular” person. It would be a cinch to balance parenting, friendships, and working out. I wouldn’t change just because I was a mom.
But here I am: most of my conversations are about how tired I am because of my son or the cute thing he’s doing now (crawling). My Facebook wall is littered with pictures of my boy. I mean, who doesn’t want to see that face everyday? I make plans and then cancel them because someone is having a rough day. Ok, two someones are usually having a rough day. There are days the workout just doesn’t get done. I either don’t have the time or the energy for it. I’m a stay-at-home-mom, but I haven’t slept in the last 8 months.
So I’m sorry. I’m sorry for the judgmental thoughts I had about you. I’m sorry for not being understanding. I’m sorry for thinking that you just didn’t get it and that I could be a mom better than you; that I had it all figured out when you didn’t. I’m sorry.
I have come to realize the error of my ways. I will try to be a better friend to you. I will not stop posting pictures of my child and I hope you won’t either. And please know if anyone else is giving you grief for being a mom, I can be a sympathetic ear.
Aka Milo’s Mom